| yes dear...the life of an almost married couple |
[01 Aug 2005|04:03pm] |
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This week has been pretty basic. I worked alllllllll week last
week which sucked but I owe school way too much money to not work all
week. In fact I really don't even remember last week because
there was nothing to it except for work which means although I live
with Jay I never see him since I work at night and he works during the
day.
However I had off saturday and sunday which was awesome. Saturday Jay and I took a ride down to Jackson and went to Hurricaine Harbor
which was really fun. I'm a whimp and wouldn't go on anything too
scary much to his chagrin but we still had a really good time going on
all the rides together. We stayed till around 5 headed home, and
I cooked dinner for us. Now I cook dinner every single night for
us, yet when I say cook what I really mean is microwave. I buy
microwavable chicken, wings, homestyle entire chickens, microwable
broccoli...the hardest thing I'd say I make is heating up corn on the
stove. However, I feel kind of like a good home maker because I
do cover all the food groups (I always make a salad, chicken, and some
sort of veggies). Anyway, after dinner I wanted to go jogging and
Jay didn't want me go alone stating the central park jogger incident so
to his dismay he came along (while breathlessly complaining "I hate you
I hate you I hate you for this"). After jogging I took the best
shower of my life, straightened my hair while he read to me, and we
bought a bottle of Van Gogh Chocolate Vodka.
If you like chocoalte I would highly suggest buying this. It is a
wonderful liquor that leaves a chocolate after taste. It's 30
dollars for a 750 but it's soooo worth it, yet I wouldn't suggest
buying it to get drunk, its more of an after work drink. After
having a few drinks we called it a night.
Sunday we woke up and played with the dog, and headed over to Jay's
parents house. They were having a barbeque for Jeremy's grandparents
who came up from Florida for a few weeks. Jeremy is especially
close to his grandparents because he spent his first ten years living
with them so it was really nice to have them here for so long.
The barbeque was his uncles and aunts and the whole family and it was
just really nice. We then found out Jeremy's grandparents bought us a
couch and a table with chairs which is amazing but I feel so awkward
taking...but we have furniture!!! Yay!!! It comes August 13th and
we're gonna have a small party not long after since we finally will
have a completely furnished apartment. After coming home and
eating so much food I went jogging again, and he came along again
begrudgingly and we watched the 4400 and fell asleep. It was a
great weekend.
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| I love tiny |
[21 Jul 2005|04:11pm] |
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10 reasons why dawn can never have a party again
10. no one wears home the right shoes, if they wear shoes at all
9. contrary to popular belief girls screaming karayoke style isn't enjoyable
8. not suprisingly the guy to girl ratio at the party was about 7500 to 1 (guys 7500)
7. the last time i saw that many people that thought they were black i was at a beastie boy concert
6. the shiny bags brought by all the girls have caused temporary blindness
5. dawn "you guys can't smoke at my house...okay well you can smoke weed on the porch"
4. dawn was drunk before anyone showed up (but thats also the reason i love dawn)
3. unsubstantiated consensual rape....quoi?
2. people sparatically jumping out of second story windows (my boyfriend of course)
1. JODI'S CAR GETTING STOLEN BY A PERSON WHO ATTENDED THE PARTY
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| happy america day |
[05 Jul 2005|12:33pm] |
What a crazy week. I went to a party with Dawn, Jodie and Emily
sometime last week and as usual....mayhem. The night all in all
was fun except for the weather which sucked making it very difficult to
smoke cigarettes, but hey, we're all trying to quit anyway right?
I spent the weekend in Montreal...again. I love Montreal but I
think this time i've had enough of the quebecois and won't be returning
again. Besides, I have two really big vacations coming up (the
vegas- grand canyon trip in october, and the disney, all of florida
trip in april) so I can't be blowing any money on small vacations for
awhile.
We arrived in Montreal friday night very late (after hitting hours of
traffic), so we just headed to the casino had a few drinks, went back
to our hotel (the delta which is not that expensive and the nicest
hotel in the city so I highly recommend it) and passed out. When
we woke on saturday we got right in the car and went straight to Tim
Horton's which for those of you don't know is like a dunkin donuts over
there but SO MUCH BETTER you don't even know. I seriously am
planning on ordering things over the internet. Best coffee, best
doughnuts, best chocolate croissants, best sandwiches, best
soups. The only difference is the portion size...a small coffe is
about the size of a kids cup here, and the large is the size of our
small, but they always said american's are pigs right?
After tim horton's we checked out jazz fest which is a big festival
over there where all the top Jazz people come and play for the people
and do parades, however we didn't here much jazz more of weird love
parade type music which leaves little to be desired so really the love
fest just delivered us massive amounts of traffic in the city. We
went down to the old city (which is soooooooo beautiful) but I'm
allergic to horses and they had horse drawn carriages everywhere so we
couldn't stay long. We got lunch at the hard rock cafe and I got
a blue hawain which rocked me unbelievably considering it was only one
drink. After lunch we went back to the hotel for awhile and
relaxed and then went down to the hotel bar and got three drinks for 11
dollars a piece so basically got ripped off to all hell. We hung
out for awhile and got reservations at a french restaurant but were too
full when the time came around so just got ready to go to the clubs and
ended up at some club on crescent called club crescent for the night
and spent too much money and drank too much.
The next day when we woke we went back to Tim Hortons (you don't know)
and went back to the old city where we spent a lot more time taking
pictures of the beautiful buildings and this was followed by us
exploring outside montreal in the small cities which was stunning
itself. We came back in the city around 5 and had dinner at an
italian restaurant (which is always a mistake in a FRENCH
country). We ordered calamari to start, I ordered chicken parm
(which by the way came out grilled chicken with cheese) and jay got
some italian dish we don't have in america and to be honest I don't
think is italian and the waiter told us we were eating for three even
though in america if someone got all our food combined as a serving
they would be complaining about the portion. Whatever the case
the flambointly gay waiter was pretty cool (oh by the way montreal is a
huge gay city, they have the gay flag outside of every hotel with the
canadian flag its actual quite nice to be in such a liberal
city). This was followed by the casino where we lost a little so
left, and went back to the hotel to relax and watch tv (but of course
there's only one channel in english so tv wasn't really all that
great). This was followed by club thursdays where we both got
wasted which was really dumb because we spent hundreds of dollars that
we shouldn't be spending because it was our rent money that's due
today...go us. However, I was blessed with luck to get 700
dollars back from my security deposit in new brunswick so all is well.
We checked out two hours late because we were hung over, and spent 3
hours in traffic at customs, but after that the ride wasn't so bad
seeing occasional fireworks. But the best part is we made it to
giants stadium at exactly 11 so we got to see the entire fireworks
show, JUST IN TIME, it was a wonderful way to end the weekend.
Ah. and here's some pictures of recent endeavors.....
me, mel, dawn and britt
my new apartment!
mela love
my baby
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| peace jerz |
[14 Jun 2005|01:24pm] |
Things have so not been a jersey summer recently. This last year has never ceased to amaze me in the differences I've passed through. In the last year I went from being out of control crazy kid always getting in fights with my parents, living at home just being a child. Now that a year has passed I've lived in two apartments, I've completely supported myself and really learned to grow...but everything comes with a price. I lost my youth in the middle of it.
I love my life, I love Jeremy, I love my apartment, I love my dog, I love my work.....but sometimes I miss backyards with cheap beer.
Anyway I'm moving to Florida...not quite yet though, but by the year's end
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| RIDICULOUS |
[12 May 2005|02:03pm] |
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take my breath away |
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Okay, so last night was supposed to be girls night. Jeremy is pretty much considered one of the girls to Kelly and Dawn since we all live together so he was included in the festivities. It started out with Jay, Kel, Dawn, Ashley and I a 30 shot bottle of bacardi razz and a 20 shot bottle of captain morgans (we're rum drinkers in the guilden household...well jay's really a jd drinker but he's outnumbered). Then two randomn guys from across the street named Phil and Tom join in on the fest and Motley comes by for awhile but he left early because at 4am he was going on his...I JUST GRADUATED COLLEGE WOO HOO vacation.
Now, this is when the night is really supposed to settle down...Jeremy goes inside and the ladies decide we'll have another drink and then call it a night. But no, life isn't that easy. Some huge guy walks onto our porch and throws soup all over our yard which ashley just planted flowers and made a pond, so obviously she flips the fuck out screaming to get out of our house...he walks down the stairs and screams "fucking WHORES"...buddy you picked the wrong porch....
Dawn starts chasing him down the street cursing him off, and I chase Dawn which in turn leads to me cursing him off because he's cursing her off and then Ashley comes to chase us and Ashley gets right up in his face and he grabs her and starts shaking her and brings his arm back to punch her at which time I jump on the guy and ashley breaking it apart, at which time the guy opens a can of soup and pours it all over ashley's head. Now at the same time Jeremy is sleeping in the house upstairs door closed on the back side of the house and we're screaming so loudly and we're down the street but our screams are so loud that they wake him up and he looks and sees the guy going to punch us at which time THE POLICE SHOW UP when jeremy walks outside with a butcher knife...good job jay.
Five police cars come and arrest the guy and almost arrest Jeremy until I run over explaining the situation...by the way...how does this even happen????? Anyway he gets arrested and he's gone and the whole thing is just a mess. Jeremy goes home and we end up going to a party across the street but it's lame so we meet up with the girls next door Lauren and Michelle and somehow walk into some randomn person's party where a guy kelly used to hook up with is there so total awkwardness randomnly along with a bunch of kids from manalapan. We stay there dancing and playing beer pong till about 3:30 go back to Lauren and Michelle's they smoke (I don't smoke anymore...okay I had one hit but that's all and then realize I don't smoke and stop) and we get home a little after 4. What a night.
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| I'd do anything- simple plan |
[11 May 2005|05:41pm] |
Things have been ultra chaotic recently. Jay and I move on saturday so friday night we're having A LOT of people over and we're gonna have a lot of liquor so everyone if anyone reading this come by....
Today I really didn't do anything. I didn't have my car because I got too drunk last night and had to leave it at a bar and have to wait for Jay to get home so we can go pick it up. I didn't wake up till noon, and then the outsiders was on so I got suckered in, and then Kelly and I went to West Point (the coffee house on easton like a minute and a half away from our house) and sat at one of the outside tables talking and laughing being nostalgic about summer 02.....anyone remember those nights?
girls night tonight...we're gonna have drinks on the front deck so ladies feel free to come.
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| keep your head up |
[05 May 2005|05:31pm] |
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this woman's work |
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Interesting. Jeremy's ex roommate from college John and Dawn have struck an interest in eachother and are seeing eachother. John is an intelligent and witty college grad who now writes for the wall street journal. It seems in Jeremy's group of friends all of them are moderately succesful. I guess going to the college of new jersey really is that much better than a degree from another school.
Last night we decided to drink when it was too late to buy liquor and no one felt like spending all the money on the bars. Ashley from downstairs had a bottle of rumplemintz, a little bit of sapphire gin and a small bit of goldschlager (sp?) combined with our beer and bacardi version of mike's hard.
Lesson of the night...rumplemintz and half and half may taste like a peppermint milkshake for a second, but later on on your stomach, not a good idea.
I can't believe the end of our lease is around the corner. It seriously feels like we moved into this apartment a week ago. Where exactly does the time go?
Jeremy and I are moving into our own BRAND NEW, beautiful apartment in a town house complex in somerset in nine days...NINE DAYS. Kelly is moving into a house on hamilton and Dawn is moving back home. However, in the note of convenience John moves into an apartment in North Brunswick the first which is without exageration five minutes from our new apartment.
Having this apartment was an adventure that I will never forget....
Saturday is officially Jay and I's one year anniversary. It strikes me as odd how quickly one year can go by. Although that first night, the first date, the night he asked me to be his girlfriend, the night he told me he loved me are all so fresh in my memory to the point where they feel so close, I feel as though I've known him forever...I can't imagine a world without Jeremy. Before Jeremy I was a completely different person surrounded by a completely different world....everything about me and everything about my life has changed. The best way to describe the difference is child and adult. I've grown so much...
So it's cinco de mayo! However, I'm not drinking. I've been drinking too much recently and I need to give it a rest.
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| Rutgers Fest |
[28 Apr 2005|04:46pm] |
Every year around this time Rutgers decides to go crazy. The festivities start off tonight around 11pm pre-gaming in the apartment. Then Dawn, Ashley, Kelly and I are venturing off to the many parties to occur.
Tomorrow morning at 10am pregaming begins and Rutgers Fest officially kicks off around 1 feating performers such as Nas. The festival runs till about 7 and then its sin city in New Brunswick. As a lady, I warn all you other girls, avoid the streets Friday night. The men are horrific and will stop at nothing to degrade the girls. Anyway we're DRIVING to Ashley, Oliver and company's party on Hamilton (which is literally a street and a half away) and staying there for the duration of the night.
If anyone wants to come hit up jay's cell because mine's still missing in action. Hope to see you all!
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| hey little sister what have you done |
[22 Apr 2005|03:48pm] |
I'm hung over. I drank too much again. Whatever.
Tonight Christopher, or Motley, Kelly's boyfriend is having a party
with approximately 60 people showing up. Of the 60, 11 are
pregaming at our house. Now normally this wouldn't be a problem,
but living in an apartment that's too small for four ppl to move around
in, 11 more should be interesting.
Kim and her boyfriend are coming at seven to make jello shots.
It's 4 now and I'm still in pajamas. I'm obviously a morning
person.
I have nothing to wear- bah. It's interesting to me how
much girls look into outfits. Kelly and I have been discussing
what we were going to wear to this for two weeks. TWO
WEEKS. That's pathetic. However, I'm sure we'll be the
hottest girls there, so in the end it pays off.
Does society really make girls that conscientous that two weeks of
planning goes into an outfit. Well I guess I'm a sucker,
kudos to me.
I miss Jess-a-love and Melanie....ladies come to the apartment!!!!
Oh, and I lost my cell phone again, and Jay worries about me being
without a cell phone so he gave me his phone in case I come into an
emergency situation which makes me feel shitty because now he doesn't
have a phone. He's protective which is endearing. Living
with him I imagined to be really hard, but now that I have for this
long I could never not live with him. I can't imagine a night not
in bed with together...we haven't spent one night apart since he moved
in and honestly I don't see why we ever would.
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[11 Apr 2005|07:59pm] |
Sometimes I miss living in Manalapan...
I miss all the kids I used to be friends with...the nights filled with innocence and childhood.
Just chilling with a bunch of people I grew up with drinking and talking in someone's back yard....
I thought moving to New Brunswick would bring the craziest nights of my life, but what I realized was moving to New Brunswick did nothing more but make me grow up. Instead of partying the simple life with a bottle of liquor in a kids back yard now its trips to the Bahamas, puppies, and full time work.
Now don't get me wrong, I love the life I live, but not having a single friend who still lives in Manalapan makes me nostalgic for the good old days..once....once and every while
To all my old friends, don't think I've forgotten you, no matter how long it's been and what road we parted on, you're all still in my fondest memories
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| six under ground |
[04 Mar 2005|09:50pm] |
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six under ground-sneaker pimps |
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Things have been good recently,
The apartment is well. Jay, Kelly, Dawn and I are drinking
frangelico/amaretto/7 up/orange juice drinks tonight. The
outcome- tastes like a chocolate orange...awesome.
I was sick yesterday/today. I had to stop all of everything today
because I had a fever last night and threw up. I feel better
today though, so horay.
I went shopping yesterday and spent way too much money. I'm so
irresponsible..on the plus side, I got three skirts, two pairs of sweat
pants, a pair of jeans, four tops, and three jackets to go with my
sweat pants...yeah, I'm an ass, and when money's tight, I go
shopping...go katie.
Tiny's driving me crazy. She decided to go to the bathroom on my
bed today....so I decided to leave her in the cage, for the rest of the
week...okay that's a little much but definately for the rest of the
night. Damn dog.
I'm going to the bahamas with Jay for my birthday the first week in
April and my brother has been nice enough to say he would watch the dog
at his apartment. As much as I love the little terror, I'm
excited to have time away from her
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[24 Feb 2005|04:22pm] |
I figured I would give everyone a glimpse of apartment life...so here ya go
me and jay being silly
jim passed out on our couch after a night of drinking
the lovely livingston girlfriends
me drunk to all hell
kel and steve before he left for korea
me kelly and dawn looking like we're hooking up...we're not
puppy
im drunk and bitchy
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| too long |
[18 Feb 2005|11:52am] |
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Shorty Wanna Be a Thug |
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Well, things have certainly been on the interesting side lately.
Tiny, or shall we say Tiny the terrible is teething and although it's
adorable that she took off our toilet seat cover and now considers it
her new toy, it gets rather bothersome when she goes for the leather
stilettos, so there's been a lot of "Tiny NO!!!" recently.
I don't know how to update on months on end so I'll just update on the last couple days...
Valentine's day was absolutely wonderful. Jeremy decorated my entire room with hearts and cupids and it was stunning. He gave me a dozen long stem roses and a box of godiva
and of course my lovely valentine puppy. He also got me bubble
bath mix so we could take a bubble bath and he rented me the movie "The
Notebook" which I've been dying to see since it was in the theatres and
he's been procrasinating seeing since it's been in the theatre.
The night all in all was one of the best nights of my life, and by far
the most romantic. Moo, you're the best.
I don't even remember tuesday...oh wait, yes I do. I did nothing
except for go tanning with Kelly....all day. It was
awesome. Then me and Jay went to friday's in manalapan at night
because we couldn't figure out where there was one in the
brunswicks. It was really good we did the whole 3 course $12.99
thing and I very much enjoyed the food so I would recommend going to
anyone and everyone.
Wednesday was interesting because me and Jay got in a fight, he called me a bitch, and I ran him over with the car....literally.
Now I know this might sound bad ordinarily, a girlfriend running her
boyfriend over, but he deserved it. No I'm just kidding, not
about running him over, I really did do that, but he didnt deserve
it. However, the whole thing wasn't intentional. He got in
the back of the car to try to stop me from sleeping at my parents house
for the night (mid fight trying to run kind of thing) and I thought he
would just jump on top of the trunk like he normally does, but
apparently I pressed the gas a little too hard and he was taken under
the car.....sorry honey...eee.
Wednesday was also nice though because I went to Jessalyn's and I
haven't seen her in forever, and it was so nice to hear how everyone's
doing and hang out.
After Jay and I's fight (by the way I know this day is totally out of
order) we decided to eat at the East Grand Chinese Buffet...wow that
was a mistake.
Thursday I spent the day with Dawn. I died her hair
hence causing us all to inhale toxic fumes in the apartment for 24
hours but it looks good. We also decided we don't go out enough
so thursday would be the night. Wow, big mistake. We got
ANNHILATED stumbled back at 3am through the streets of new brunswick
alone, but hey, no fear, I brought a screwdriver, woke up the puppy,
and according to Jay BOMBARDED through the house ranting and raving
about locking the doors so we wouldn't get raped (why is this what me
and my friends visualize when we're drunk???) and it was really awesome
waking up at 7am for class this morning. Yay katie, for
being a lush. Kudos to me.
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| puppy love |
[11 Feb 2005|12:21am] |
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Valentine's day...and I got a dachshund puppy, named Valentine, who we call Tiny. She's from Jay as a Valentine's day gift. I'm in love.
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| merry christmas |
[28 Dec 2004|09:10am] |
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"if you don't don't"-jimmy eat world |
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I had the most wonderful Christmas of my life. I got stuck working Christmas Eve
because I'm going away for new years and new years day, which sucked,
but after that everything was wonderful. My boss told me we were
closing at 8 Christmas Eve to sucker me in, which of course was a lie
and I didn't get out till 9:30. This was followed by me doing a
quick change in the bathroom, and zooming to Red Bank to meet Jay and his family at his uncle's house.
They had already eaten so I heated up some food (sooooooooooo good) and
his uncle and aunt were sweet enough to get me this thing from bath and
body works even though I only see them on holidays (and I was ooooooooo
so relieved I had gotten them a box of chocolates). This was
followed by us going back to my house and having the traditional sea
food (even though everyone was already asleep). Jay and I
exchanged gifts. I got him the new small playstation with san
andreas (?) and madden 05, with the star wars trilogy, the lord of the
rings trilogy, the new steven king book, a classical music cd, and a
bulldog book. I was fortunate enough to have a month where I
didn't have to spend any money and so I really went all out for
Christmas. Jay got me more than I would ever ever ever ask
for. He got me lite bright (the stupid kids game my parents never
got me when I was a little girl- such a cute idea), dumbo on DVD, a new
beautiful jacket, a 50 dollar gift card to Sephora, an argyle sweater
(because he's awesome), (not to forget my watch, dumbo, and my
christmas tree as early gifts) and a 3k diamond bracelet that literally took my breath away.
It's so beautiful, and is worth so much money that I'm afraid to wear
it. I can't believe he spent so much. I would of been happy
with lite bright! I'm not even sure I'm going to bring it to our house
in New Brunswick because I'm afraid it will get stolen. To Jay-
my love, you are the most selfless person I have ever met.
We woke up Christmas morning and
I started experimenting making drinks for my family to get drunk
on. I made alcoholic egg nog from scratch (thanks to Jeremy's
parents who bought me a beautiful bartender's guide/recipe book and a
beautiful sweater/jacket). Mission success! We opened gifts
soon after. I had gotten my brother and Monika a 50 dollar gift
card to Pier 1 and the game uno (because they wanted it?), my father
the wizard of us on dvd (his favorite movie) and I made him a scrap
book of memories from our old house (he's sentimental), and I got my
mom and $80 gift card to get her hair colored and trimmed with my
hairdresser. Between my parents and Lenny and Monika I made out
with the cutest boots I've been eyeing down for about 3 months now, a
book on impressionist art because Monika is the most intuitive person
I've ever met, money for my highlights, a blanket, and chocolate "from
poland". I am so fortunate to have such generous people surround
me. This Christmas I can literally say I could have never asked
for, or even wanted more.
Christmas we just hung around and got fat, and me Jay my brother and
Monika played pictionary as well as other various games throughout the
night.
The day after Christmas we went back to Jay's
because his mother was FLIPPING OUT about the catastrophic state his
room was in. One hour and I had it clean with virtually no help
from Jay (what is it with men and cleaning?).
We then headed over to the cathedral in Newark which is probably the
most beautiful thing I have ever seen. After the church we met Dawn and Anthony at Applebees and I got drunk off of half an LIT I shared with Jay and Dawn got me the cutest bag because she's a sweetheart.
We went back to my house and played playstation which I got bored of
after about 5 seconds but kept playing for my baby. Then we
attempted to watch star wars but it was already 3am and we both fell
asleep on the couch and maybe half an hour later he took me upstairs
and we passed out in beds (much more sufficient then the couch even if
my parents refuse for us to sleep in the same room).
We woke up to the beautiful snow Monday morning and headed straight over to the mall-highlights! And
I highlighted my hair once again so I'm blondish/caramel again and feel
pretty. Unfortunately the second it was done I had to throw it
right up and go to work, but first I got to go to sephora to use my
gift card (thanks Jay!). I then went to work which sucked at
life, but it's all worth it in the end. I already have half the
security deposit that's due the 15th so kudos to working I
suppose. Unfortuantely I'm working monday night tuesday night wed
night thurs night but then after work thurs WE'RE GOING TO
MONTREAL!!!! I then come home monday and work Monday night,
tuesday night, wed night, thurs night, fri night and sat night to pay
off the apartment. Dear god that's gonna suck. But
Montreal!!!!!!!
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| exuberant |
[20 Dec 2004|02:00pm] |
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I am currently considering myself one of the luckiest people to have ever graced this earth.
It almost all seems too good to be true, because everything is PERFECT
right now. I'm not used to everything working out, I'm not used
to having things turn out the way I want them...it's just not the way
it is. It's almost like when someone you know dies....it's like
surreal, you can't comprehend it. That's how I am about
everything going on in my life right now.
Kelly, Dawn and I are on January 15th moving into a house in new brunswick.
The deposits already down, it's ours. I'm like....going out of my
head here of excitement and disbelief that this is happening. The
house is pretty big but it's two floors and we'd have the second floor
(we don't know who's living on the first floor but the apartments are
completely sepearated with locks and everything). We each have
our own bedroom, we have a kitchen, and a living room. Our
apartment itself isn't that big but we all have our own room, we
have a kitchen with a stove and microwave and dishwasher (I think?), a
living room, we're in the prime spot of new brunswick (literally party
zone of new brunswick) we have a front deck, a back yard, and a
driveway to fit all three of our cars. We have new carpeting and
the walls have just been painted. All of our parents have given
us their blessing, we sent in the deposit and I talked to the realtor
today and he said its ours now that he has the deposit. We sign
the lease by the end of the week. I can't even believe this is
happening. We're each paying for it on our own, and with
everything worked out, rent, utilities, car insurance, cigarettes,
gasoline, cable, and 200 dollars on drinking alone, it only works
out to me working 4-5 days a week (which I already do). This is
so crazy, I can't believe this is actually happening. I don't
think I've ever been so happy in my entire life, seriously my entire
fucking life. Like......what?!!?!? I can't I'm just dying of happiness
right now.
Me and Jay are going to Montreal for New Years Eve....I pretty much have my consent. It's almost Christmas.....
This month is gonna fly by. Jay's birthday
is this week, then it's christmas eve (which I have to work :(
....sucks), then Christmas, then a week goes by and I'm in Montreal,
then I come back work really hard for two weeks and..bam I'm living in
my own house. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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| everything happens for a reason- |
[18 Dec 2004|10:36pm] |
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mood |
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excited |
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music |
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me...screaming out of excitement |
] |
I got in a fight with my dad the other day. The fight was pretty
wicked and a lot of intense feelings were displayed. It was a
very uncomfortable situation, but it led to good. This fight led
me to once again desire moving out of the house. Kelly recently
transferred to Rutgers for the spring semester, Dawn has currently been
going crazy, and I've wanted an apartment away from here for a number
of reasons.
1. I've never lived away from home before.
2. I never wanted to live in a dorm, sorority, or with people I didn't know
3. Before I move in with Jay I've wanted a chance to live with my friends for awhile
Recently, this has all become possible. With Kelly going to
rutgers, and with me and Dawn being work-a-holics we decided it was
time for the three of us to live together....and we've found
something. A three bedroom house which we can afford, we just
have to hustle like crazy this month.
I don't remember ever being so excited in my life. I get to live
away from my parents (FINALLY) and away from all the stress and
negative feelings in this household. I get to live with my two
best friends. I get to be alone with Jeremy and be able to have
him practically move in with me.
Seriously, words don't describe. We're going to see the guy
tomorrow, and if all goes well, the house is ours the 15th of january.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Christmas Eve in Sarajevo |
[13 Dec 2004|12:04pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 complacent |
] |
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music |
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work- jimmy eat world |
] |
I am the luckiest girl in the entire world. Moving has been a lot more difficult for me than I thought it would be. Jeremy has been there through it all pulling me through all of it and for this I'm more grateful than anything in this world. Earlier this week I called him crying because my mother refuses to get a Christmas tree this year
or even decorate because she's afraid it will mess up the house.
Christmas has always been a huge holiday to me so this was nothing
short of heartbreaking. I called Jeremy
crying and sure enough, yesterday he took me to brock farms where he
bought me a fake little fiber glass tree that lights up in all
beautiful different colors. He bought red and green garland and
strung it all over the room and he bought real tree branches from
christmas trees so my room will smell like Christmas. I am so happy to be with such a wonderful person.
Last week I was upset because in the middle of a play fight he broke my
watch, which let's face it was years old, all scratched up and the
battery hasn't been working for the entire course of our relationship,
I was just too attached to the old thing to take it off. So he
bought me a beautiful new one. Anytime a guy has ever bought me
jewelry before I opened it up, kind of looked at it with an "ugh" going
through my whole body, pretended to of course love it, and eventually
the jewlery grew on me. This time was different. He bought
me the exact watch I would of picked out if I had been at the store
myself. It literally took my breath away how intuitive he is to me.
I somehow managed to loose my stuffed elephant in the move. Daisy
was the softest cutest elephant that Jeremy had bought me at the Bronx
Zoo early last spring. Although it's just a stuffed animal when
things went crazy with my family and I wasn't living at home for awhile
that stuffed animal kept me company while I slept and made me feel safe
and at home. It has such sentimental value to it. I was
very upset about having lost it so Jeremy bought me the christmas
edition of dumbo at the disney store and he's soooooo cute, but I call
her a she because she's white and pink.
I never thought I'd have someone who would care so deeply about me, who would do everything just to ensure my happiness. Jeremy
is the light at the end of the tunnel, the air that makes me breathe,
the fuel that lights my fire. He is every smile, and every joy
that has been brought to my life and I will spend every ounce in me to
ensure his happiness...always.
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| I almost died yesterday |
[07 Dec 2004|12:24pm] |
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mood |
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 grateful |
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music |
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joy to the world |
] |
I write this entry because I am utterly so grateful and appreciative to be alive at this moment. Yesterday I was a literal split second away from a fatal head on collision. I was on 537 all the way down almost by the outlets going back to Manalapan to go to work when a truck cut across the highway to make a left. He did it too close in front of me causing me to slam on the breaks but my breaks didn't work..instead my car hydroplanned. Frantically realizing I was approximately 5 seconds away from crashing straight into the truck (an 18 wheeler) I started pumping on the breaks and turning the car into the direction that the car was being pulled before I got slammed right into the left lane- the incoming traffic lane. 537 is a 50mph in both directions road similar to 520...when my car went in the left lane it was impossible for me to regain control of and there was another huge truck right there...all you heard was the beeping from his truck and the absolute horrid screetching from my car and his truck. I am not exagerating when I say I now believe in god because at the LITERAL last second before my car would of went straight into the truck causing absolute fatality on instant my car pulled out of the lane and this time shooted to the other side of the highway almost into the woods when I then regained control of the car. The experience nearly gave me a heartattack. I never knew what hyperventalating was until yesterday. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't stop shaking and I couldn't stop crying for about half an hour.
I came a split second away from the end of my existence. It was just like every dream I ever had about dying in a car accident- the huge truck, loosing control of the car and having nothing but my impending doom to wait for. Something happens when you come that close to death...you realize how fragile life really is and how easy it is to be gone from this world.
All day I kept thinking about what if I had died...my parents new house would be ruined...would they ever recover from it? How would my brother have dealt or Jeremy or my friends? It's really a horrid thought.
I called my father after and he picked my car up from work to get new tires (tires I've been meaning to fix since the summer started but just bought one new one because of expenses). He bought me ones that are specifically good in the rain and snow since my car doesn't handle well in either (thanks daddy).
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| chestnuts roasting on an open fire |
[22 Nov 2004|02:12pm] |
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mood |
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jubilant |
] |
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music |
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There she goes |
] |
I had an absolutely perfect weekend. Thursday night I went out and partied with the girls which is always fun.
Friday I worked till around 10:30 and then came home, had a glass of cabarnet, and waited for Jay. When he arrived we decided since it was already so late and our night was just beginning we were going to stay up and watch the sunrise. The night was wonderful and I cannot by any stretch of the imagination complain. Oh god I love my boyfriend.
Saturday I woke up around 12:30 and let Jay sleep so I hung out with my mom while she baked chocolate meringue pie and I did really nothing more but watch but, hey, we all know how terribly I bake. Jay and I spent the day lounging around, watching the new Harry Potter movie, and by the time I got in the shower it was 7:30. However, doing absolutely nothing until that point was nothing short of glorious. After the shower I got all dressed up because we decided to go out to dinner. We got an italian dinner and it was so nice to just conversate over a good meal. Saturday really was perfect. We spent the rest of the night drinking and enjoying each other's company. We had a really long talk about some things that have happened in the past and it lasted again until after sunrise. However, the conversation was very essential and it let out some hidden demons that have been effecting my life for quite some time.
We woke up at noon on sunday headed back to my house, I changed and we went ice skating. It was interesting watching the 6 and 7 year old kids literally skate circles around us while I held on to the wall for dear life. The experience was endearing, and so cute. It was the perfect activity to kick off the holidays. After we had our fill of making retards of ourselves on the ice we headed over to Brock Farms where jeremy bought me replacements for my ghost and pumpkin bells that hang over the rear view mirror in my car. We decided on rudolph and frosty. They're simply adorable and put an entire element of festivity to my car- thanks baby.
By this point our energy was drained so we came back to my house and went to sleep. Well, at least Jay did...I stayed up for another half hour listening to him snore and sweetly shoved him every minute or so in the sad attempt to fall asleep while he was awoken before the snoring started again. Luckily it worked and we both awoke two hours later to my parents bringing home leftover italian food-niceeeeee.
After dinner jay helped me pack all my books from the basement so I can just load them in my car over the next week. This was followed by renting "Mickey's Twice Upon A Christmas" which was so cute it made me cry.
I couldn't of asked for a better weekend. However, the weekend is over now and I have a 40 hour week of work starting in.....twenty minutes so the happiness better last for some time.
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